I’m Spying On Citizens. So What?

Most beautiful diary,

I don’t get it.  Some bozo from the NSA leaked info that me and  my team has been spying on every citizen  for years.  So what if it’s against the law?  No one cares about the law anymore.

And no one has to worry about it unless they are doing something wrong.  I have promised american citizens that.  And I only break my promises if I really, really want to.  I don’t understand why there are so many people mad at me for this.  I wish I could just tell them to leave me alone. :(

It was pretty easy to spy.  I just went to Apple, Google, Facebook, Yahoo, Microsoft, banks, and a bunch more companys and promised them  tax breaks if they let me and my people have access to their customer’s information.  If they didn’t agree, I just sent the IRS after them and they quickly caved.  Greedy worms.  Afraid of losing their money from audits. Ha ha ha!  I sure know how to play ’em.

Thankfully the republicans don’t care.  Boehner is more concerned about catching the traitor who leaked the info.  And so is Eric Canter.  In fact, Canter said that anyone who breaks the law should have to be punished by the law.  Thank goodness he is not applying that to me, or I would be in super big trouble.

Well, I need to get back to more important things, like reading news about the NBA finals.

XOXOXOXO,

Barry “The Most Awesomeest President Ever!” Obama