Sweetest Diary,
I just heard that some unfortunate guy was sucked down into a sink hole in Florida. I’m not sure how, but I’m sure it’s Bush’s fault.
I feel so bad for the man who died and for his family. I’m going to be sure to say prayers to the great monkey god Hanuman tonight on behalf of the guy’s family.
What to do about this sink hole epidemic? I think I’m going to suggest to Harry Reid that we should make sink holes illegal. After all, no one is quicker to act without thinking than Harry. And if he fails, which would not surprise me at all, maybe I could just use the EPA? Maybe they could do something about it. I don’t care if it means shutting down prosperous businesses; If there is even an inkling of a sink hole under a building, it should immediately be condemned. I have the constitutional duty to protect citizens from sink holes. Thank the monkey god Hanuman that the founding fathers were smartified enough to put the sink hole clause in The Constitution, otherwise, nothing could be done about sink holes, ever.
With all my love,
Barry “The Most Awesomest President Ever!” Obama